Skittish

I'm there again.
In that place between past mistakes
and new opportunities to make new, bigger ones.

Why am I doing this again?
It's not to measure myself against new challenges.
It's not purely out of frustration either.
I'm doing this because it's all I have come to know,
It's the one way I have practiced in the past few years.

Sure sign of character stiffening with age.
I may be cocking this big time,
Or I may come to find a place which feels right to me.

I know it not, yet, of course.

So I add black fear to my usual restlessness.
And hope that some good will come of it.
Fool.